How I Almost Got a Job

Last week, I received this SMS:

Hi, am x I work with an international NGO, u were recommended in our company by ur friend xx of xx company (phone number). Am urgently looking for 10 ambitious, hardworking and aggressive pple 2 work with on part time and full time basis. Salary scale is between 30k to 70k full timers and 15k to 30k part timers. If interested Call this no to book a spot.

I’m sure it’s hard to turn down such an offer, especially if you’re a student like me. I was already imagining how I was going to impress them with my ‘ambition, hard work and aggressiveness’. I had considered the part-time option and could see myself making some pocket money in the evenings after class. I have a long-term imagination too, so I could picture when I’d start working full-time and make big money. I could also picture saving for that motorbike I keep dreaming about.

So there is a biker here who keeps taunting me with his small but awesome red bike. I content myself with pictures of it 🙂 I've never seen him/her though.

Were there any reservations? A few. First of all, a few typos in the text but I shrugged them off because it’s a text. Second of all, an INGO would use better recruitment ways, like newspaper/online ads? But my friends told me to just call and see what it was about.

So I made the call.

The guy who answered told me to come to their offices for briefing/training/orientation, I couldn’t decide. He told me their offices are near Nation Center and then when I asked for directions he told me, “Just come to Nation Center and call me when you’re there.”

So after class I made my way to Nation Center and called him. Before I could ask for directions, he said he’s on his way and I should wait for him. I wondered what kind of INGO this was without offices?

He came soon after and led me to this house called Kimathi Chambers, just at the end of Kimathi Street. We went up to the second floor and I was ushered into a room full of young-ish people. A saw a couple of ladies with eyebrows totally shaved off and repainted with eye-pencil. Here and there, people sat on plastic chairs talking in little groups.

So they guy finally pulled a seat and sitting very close to me (knees touching!) started telling me about the International NGO.

He told me many, many stories. How it was started by a 19 year old. How their products help ladies like me not to have mood swings during those monthly times. How we young ladies love fries and sausages, and don’t eat any fruits. How with some magical supplements, I will stop wearing glasses and eventually I’ll have vision 20/20. He asked me if my parents pay my school fees and how would I like it if I could pay for myself and drive myself to work while at it.

All this time, I had noticed a clip he wore and the company stationery bore some logo, initials of Get a New Life Dear. I have heard of them before. Their products are awesome but expensive.

So with that long talk, which would test anyone’s patience, I decided to check into foursquare and earn some points. I noticed Kimathi Chambers is not mapped and added it. It’s hard to do that when you’re having a one-on-one talk with someone. Not to mention that it’s also rude. But after 40 minutes of being told how Get a New Life Dear was going to improve my life tremendously (I’d be driving a 4×4 vehicle in 6 months), I can be forgiven.

He then went on to explain how money is made in the company. Through network marketing. He talked of Facebook and said he could see I was addicted to Facebook (I was actually on foursquare). He told me there is something new called Twitter (Dude, I’ve been a member since ’09!). Explained to me how social networks function. Told me how easy it would be to make money by just introducing the business to new people and how easily I could climb the ranks to Ruby Director and earn 100k per month.

If I hadn’t heard of Get a New Life Dear., I might’ve been convinced to join. However, I know about it and my thoughts? It’s a pyramid scheme. A legal pyramid scheme.

In Other News
There are a number of interesting pictures that I have seen this week:

This is a reflection of Langata Road (at the T-Mall roundabout) in a classroom at Strathmore University. I still don't understand how that image is projected in space, as it were!

Nairobi is beautiful, no? I love living in Nairobi.


The venue for the next BAKE BHH is KP’s Lounge. This Friday, 3rd June, From 6pm. See you there. You don’t have to be a blogger, aspiring bloggers are welcome.

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34 Responses to How I Almost Got a Job

  1. Samora says:

    Albert almost got the same job! I know some classmate who is earning good money from GNLD but it is not the kind of job I would do. Btw what is at KP`s?


  2. Anonymous says:

    I remember being subjected to something similar. I got an email and was told to travel quite far from home to some dinky office in the more industrial part of the city. I was quite desperate for a job so I thought I’d stick it out.

    Turns out, I’d have to travel with one of their sales men doing door-to-door sales to companies.

    The guy was actually angry because I was not interested and I was like “Look, you called me.”



  3. Anonymous says:

    He he, I was convinced to try GNLD some years back, never made a cent!


    • Anonymous says:

      I know someone who agreed to join just to shut his recruiter up! Since then he’s never made a single sale!


  4. Emm Fitzgerald says:

    Wow! 15+K for part time. So what’s a good salary over there?
    I’m in London but thinking of coming to work there. Is 170k per month (starting salary) a realistic expectation or not really?
    Would appreciate a reply
    Kind regards,


    • Anonymous says:

      Dear Em,

      It all depends, of course, on what kind of job you’re doing and who you work for. If it’s the United Nations, then 170k is not realistic.

      If it’s a middle income business, 170k is a pipe dream.

      But take heart, the cost of living here is much less than in London so whatever you earn will be fine. I’d say anything above 70K should be good enough.


  5. Adaya J says:

    Glad you skipped that scam. Though the money would sure have been handy . Like the bike, its a pulsar dtsi 180 sleek, economical , mid priced ,commuter bike. Locally available through Bajaj bike dealers I believe.
    where is KP @?


    • Anonymous says:

      thanks for info about the bike! Now I know where I’ll get it when the time comes!

      KP’s is near Alliance Francais. If you’re there just ask to be shown KP’s. You’re coming?


  6. Adaya J says:

    Glad you skipped that scam. Though the money would sure have been handy . Like the bike, its a pulsar dtsi 180 sleek, economical , mid priced ,commuter bike. Locally available through Bajaj bike dealers I believe.
    where is KP @?


  7. Cyn atamba says:

    watch out for fraudsters.


  8. Woolie says:

    Great bike. Thanks for shedding light on the scam.


    • Anonymous says:

      Gotta find the owner of that bike! Costs about USD 2000 though!

      GNLD is not really a scam, they sell great products but it is a pyramid business


  9. Mackel Tisa says:

    Hahaha scammers. Dont worry you’ll see the owner of that bike soon enough, you could ask for a ride you take a lap around Mada hehe


  10. I’m so love this blog, already bookmarked it! Thanks.


  11. Shankinano says:

    just got one crazy sms lyk dat one today hahahahh had to CSI the thing n i bumped into this….thanks men kenyans are deep pplz


  12. Interesting tale, I was a victim of such a silly scam two years ago when I was in campus, only in my case I was invited by a person I ‘knew’; he lied to me that some NGO was hiring students to undertake some research…to back up his tall tale, he told me how 20 KU students were already earning 15K..Ever the broke student, I accepted instantly and went to I&M building only to see the symbols “GNLD”! I knew about these scammers from previous tales so I left as fast as I had arrived…without looking back! And that was the end of my “friendship” with my Mr. Scammer. I wonder, if their products are so good, why don’t they just tell people the TRUTH about their company?


  13. is is those G…..People….. their marketing strategy to get sales people iko down too sana, every time i seen some one with those tu green/black bags n badges i go Nkt…


  14. quareez says:

    so i saw this ad on wednesday…”we are sn American Consortium dealing with Poverty and Disease Alleviation looking for serious people to work with either part time or full time.If interested call 07……..” so i decided to call since i really needed a job. a lady picked n told me that the job that was available was a networking & PR job n i should meet her the following day(Thursday) at Kimathi Chambers. I got really uneasy after she told me about networking since all i thought of was GNLD but i convinced myself that maybe this was differentsl since I only knew of GNLD being at ICEA building. So i took a jav to tao still not sure if i wanted. I decided to google Kimathi Chambers and I saw a very interesting results but this 1 jus won it all…’How I Almost Got A Job’…I jus Laughed My Ass Off n madr a detour went and bought movies grabbed a bite and went back home.
    This GNLD people can jus say anything to get into their Schemes but its not only GNLD but also there is Tianshi,Forever Living,Happy Science,Qi,some other scheme called Matrix*something* and am sure there are many more I don’t know but Savvykenya thanx 4 the heads-up.
    If y really have to make some money,trust me this is not the way u would want to go.You will take forever to even get to 10k.


  15. peter mwaniki says:

    got the same message today. i cant wait………


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