How I Almost Got a Job

Last week, I received this SMS:

Hi, am x I work with an international NGO, u were recommended in our company by ur friend xx of xx company (phone number). Am urgently looking for 10 ambitious, hardworking and aggressive pple 2 work with on part time and full time basis. Salary scale is between 30k to 70k full timers and 15k to 30k part timers. If interested Call this no to book a spot.

I’m sure it’s hard to turn down such an offer, especially if you’re a student like me. I was already imagining how I was going to impress them with my ‘ambition, hard work and aggressiveness’. I had considered the part-time option and could see myself making some pocket money in the evenings after class. I have a long-term imagination too, so I could picture when I’d start working full-time and make big money. I could also picture saving for that motorbike I keep dreaming about.

So there is a biker here who keeps taunting me with his small but awesome red bike. I content myself with pictures of it 🙂 I've never seen him/her though.

Were there any reservations? A few. First of all, a few typos in the text but I shrugged them off because it’s a text. Second of all, an INGO would use better recruitment ways, like newspaper/online ads? But my friends told me to just call and see what it was about.

So I made the call.

The guy who answered told me to come to their offices for briefing/training/orientation, I couldn’t decide. He told me their offices are near Nation Center and then when I asked for directions he told me, “Just come to Nation Center and call me when you’re there.”

So after class I made my way to Nation Center and called him. Before I could ask for directions, he said he’s on his way and I should wait for him. I wondered what kind of INGO this was without offices?

He came soon after and led me to this house called Kimathi Chambers, just at the end of Kimathi Street. We went up to the second floor and I was ushered into a room full of young-ish people. A saw a couple of ladies with eyebrows totally shaved off and repainted with eye-pencil. Here and there, people sat on plastic chairs talking in little groups.

So they guy finally pulled a seat and sitting very close to me (knees touching!) started telling me about the International NGO.

He told me many, many stories. How it was started by a 19 year old. How their products help ladies like me not to have mood swings during those monthly times. How we young ladies love fries and sausages, and don’t eat any fruits. How with some magical supplements, I will stop wearing glasses and eventually I’ll have vision 20/20. He asked me if my parents pay my school fees and how would I like it if I could pay for myself and drive myself to work while at it.

All this time, I had noticed a clip he wore and the company stationery bore some logo, initials of Get a New Life Dear. I have heard of them before. Their products are awesome but expensive.

So with that long talk, which would test anyone’s patience, I decided to check into foursquare and earn some points. I noticed Kimathi Chambers is not mapped and added it. It’s hard to do that when you’re having a one-on-one talk with someone. Not to mention that it’s also rude. But after 40 minutes of being told how Get a New Life Dear was going to improve my life tremendously (I’d be driving a 4×4 vehicle in 6 months), I can be forgiven.

He then went on to explain how money is made in the company. Through network marketing. He talked of Facebook and said he could see I was addicted to Facebook (I was actually on foursquare). He told me there is something new called Twitter (Dude, I’ve been a member since ’09!). Explained to me how social networks function. Told me how easy it would be to make money by just introducing the business to new people and how easily I could climb the ranks to Ruby Director and earn 100k per month.

If I hadn’t heard of Get a New Life Dear., I might’ve been convinced to join. However, I know about it and my thoughts? It’s a pyramid scheme. A legal pyramid scheme.

In Other News
There are a number of interesting pictures that I have seen this week:

This is a reflection of Langata Road (at the T-Mall roundabout) in a classroom at Strathmore University. I still don't understand how that image is projected in space, as it were!

Nairobi is beautiful, no? I love living in Nairobi.

P.S.

The venue for the next BAKE BHH is KP’s Lounge. This Friday, 3rd June, From 6pm. See you there. You don’t have to be a blogger, aspiring bloggers are welcome.